When people we love pass away, it’s only natural to find ways to stay connected.

And for many, balloon releases have become a cathartic symbol of love, hope, and letting go.

Yet while releases are increasingly popular & their symbolism can be touching, the reality of this ritual is both heartbreaking and gruesome.

What really happens when balloons are released

To their credit, most people don’t realize what happens after their balloons float out of sight. It’s easy to think that they simply disappear, because in the moment, that’s what they do.

But unfortunately, that’s not how it works.

After they’re out of sight, 90 to 95% of latex balloons rise to an altitude of five miles. At that height, both the temperature & atmospheric pressure fall dramatically, which causes the helium in the balloon to expand. Eventually the latex also freezes, shatters & falls back to earth – along with any string & plastic attachments.

The remaining 5 to 10% of balloons that don’t reach that altitude either burst into larger fragments or float many miles before descending back to land or sea semi-inflated.

The damage they cause

When balloons return to earth, they are indiscriminant not only in where they land, but in who & what they impact.

When the string lands in trees, wires, and poles, birds and other wildlife can become tangled & strangled.

The following videos demonstrate a sampling of the kind of trauma balloons can cause:

When they land in water, they tangle birds and mammals, which can prevent them from feeding, strangle them and/or drown them. They can also look like jellyfish. And because some sea turtles feed almost exclusively on jellyfish, balloons are easily mistaken for their regular meal. Once ingested, the ensuing damage can become fatal if not caught early – if it’s caught at all.

Check out Chex’s story below:

What you can do

So, does strangling & drowning wildlife sound like a fitting way to honor your loved one? I’m just guessing here, but that’s probably the opposite of what you had in mind.

If you didn’t know about the realities of balloon releases before, you’re not alone. But as Maya Angelou once said, “when I know better, I do better.” 

And once you know the damage caused after balloons have been released – regardless of the intent behind it – you can’t unknow it.

Now, the question is, “what are the alternatives?”

Luckily, there are a number of options that involve togetherness and honoring the memory of a lost loved one in ways that are meaningful without being destructive. Here are 5 quick ideas to get you started.

Organize a memorial walk or hike

If the person you love loved the outdoors, why not hit the trails as a way to honor their memory?

If you’d like to keep it small, and you only want to gather as a tightknit group of 5 to 10 people, then you won’t need to do any special organizing beyond what you’d normally do to gather your friends & family together.

If you think you’d like to do a larger-scale family event, perhaps with 20+ people hiking along the trails, then you’ll need to check with the organization that owns the land as it may qualify as a “group event” that will necessitate a permit or other coordination. It doesn’t mean that you won’t be granted one, it only means that at that size, you (and they) will need to consider parking issues and whether other groups may be using the trails that same day.

If you plan to do a larger-scale community event, then you’ll need to be sure to contact the local town about specific ordinances and necessary permits and insurance so you’ll be covered. But if you’re up for the challenge of organizing a memorial event, it can be a great way to raise funds and awareness, as well as honor someone who loved to be active outdoors.

Plant a tree

Rather than release litter into the air, why not plant a native tree in someone’s honor?

If you own land, planting a tree will be an easy task. But if you want to plant a memorial tree on conservation land, be sure to work carefully with the organization that owns the land to be sure that doing so falls within their policies.

When it comes down to narrowing your choice of species, always work with a local native nursery to help you choose an appropriate tree and/or talk with a local extension forester or naturalist who can provide some guidance. Not only do you not want to plant an exotic species that will cause native species harm, but you want to be sure that what you DO plant will have the best chance of survival.

That said, keep in mind that as living things, trees can fall victim to disease, insects, weather, and other struggles. And planting a tree does not guarantee that it will survive. If you’re willing to accept that risk, then a memorial tree may work well for you. But if it would break your heart to see that “your” tree had been toppled, then another option might be better for you.

Donate time or money in their honor

Was there a cause that your loved one was passionate about or that you knew they always loved? Balloon releases can be expensive, so why not invest that money into something meaningful?

You can take the same amount of money that you would have spent on a balloon release – or any amount of money you’d like – and donate it to an organization that touched them.

If donating money isn’t feasible – or it doesn’t feel as meaningful – roll up your sleeves and donate your time to an organization in need of some help. Just remember that becoming a volunteer is a commitment, so if you’d only like to volunteer in the short-term, it’s better to find a one-off opportunity such as a trail-maintenance day, volunteering at a 5K or another event to satisfy this connection.

Practice random acts of kindness

Though they may be gone from the world, your loved one’s legacy is in those they leave behind. And if you’re looking to release anything into the world, let it be kindness – not balloons.

Need a few ideas to get started?

• Pay for someone’s coffee in line behind you, or for someone’s meal at a restaurant.
• Donate your gently worn clothes to a violence prevention organization for victims of sexual assault to wear after leaving the hospital (often their clothing has to be kept as evidence)
• Prepare a meal for your family or for a friend who could use a hand
• Offer a mom friend or a friend with an ailing parent some assistance so they can get out of the house to run some errands
• Leave a generous tip

Reconnect with the living

Rather than releasing harm into the world, you can choose to create a living memorial by connecting with those who are still with you.

All that’s needed is a commitment to reaching out to the people in your life with whom you want to continue cultivating a relationship or perhaps that you haven’t been in touch with for awhile. And make a point to connect with them more regularly.

For example, perhaps you commit to yourself that on Monday evenings, you’ll send one message to someone. Maybe it’s the same someone for now, or maybe it’s someone new each time. Whatever your commitment, it provides you with an opportunity to foster your social connections – which not only honors the person you’ve lost, but also restores the power they bring to your life.

Finally, what if your family really wants to release balloons?

If you’ve lost a loved one, or are honoring an anniversary of their passing, it can be difficult to see past your own grief to reason with others.

If you’re feeling pressured, do your best to note the points above – that releasing balloons won’t honor them the way they think. You might consider sharing a photo or video, and if necessary, be very frank about your feelings around life and death.

For many of us, seeing someone we love suffer either as a result of a physical or mental illness (or both) is heartbreaking. Watching them disappear little by little, knowing how much they’re hurting, takes a little piece of us with them. And we’d never wish that on anyone else.

Neither would they.

Yet that’s precisely the type of suffering that balloon releases cause. Because when animals ingest latex and plastic or are caught up in strings, they don’t die an instant death. They languish for days, even months if they aren’t found by a predator first.

Though we don’t see it happen, it’s important to understand that it isn’t a peaceful death. And it’s a direct result of our actions when we choose to release balloons.

If you end up giving in because you’ve lost the energy to fight them, that’s okay. But if you can, do your best to advocate for one of the many alternatives, all of which offer a much kinder and gentler memorial to the life your loved one lived.

For more ideas and information about balloon releases, visit BalloonsBlow.org.